Gail Writes: Part IV
He’s baaaaak! Not Michael Jordan but Chef Boyardee. He’s in demand and flying off the shelves of grocery stores all over the country. Get the Beefaroni while you can as it’s going, going, going, gone! The brands that were left in the dust for years are on the front lines now. Hello Aunt Jemima, oh how I loved the pancakes of my childhood and the Log Cabin Syrup poured over them until they floated on the plate. Now all I want is to eat dozens of those comforting little pancakes. Bring ‘em on! Doesn’t Swanson plate a meal as well as any Michelin star chef? Those neatly sectioned off compartments filled with fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and fruit compote are yummy and no dish washing required. Fried chicken was my favorite but turkey had the brownie or it could have been Salisbury steak. At any rate the brownie was amazing and made my skin break out but I didn’t care.
Bring on the unhealthy food. I want those old labels and nasty ingredients to keep me feeling safe. Hey, they might also be virus killers. It doesn’t matter now does it? A big old Betty Crocker chocolate cake to make me fat all over again like when I was growing up. Who cares if it took years to shed the pounds and torturous work-outs? To hell with size four Betty, I want cake! Sprinkle it with Pepperidge Farm Goldfish or Cheetos; on second thought put the Goldfish and Cheetos on the side but don’t forget them in this time of Corona eating.
I now think the Pillsbury Doughboy is a hottie. And he makes it so easy for me to be a pastry chef. No Great British Bake Off nonsense just twist the cardboard package and voila 12 minutes later: cookies, croissants, or rolls….I win! So many of my childhood meal memories are here to make me feel warm, safe, ten pounds overweight and twelve again.
Pancakes are my new best friends.
COMFORT FOOD IN CORONA TIME
Writer, Comedian, Author of Gonepausal